Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Bad Nun

Title:  Bad Nun
Studio:  Hot Candy Films (AEBN)
Writer/Director:  Nica Noelle
Released:  November 2014
Performers:  Magdalene St Michaels, Nikita Denise, Lara Brookes, Seth Gamble, Tyler Nixon, Mark Davis, Ian Whitcomb (non-sex as Father Thomas)

One of the nice things about Hell is that I’ll finally get to meet Nica Noelle.  Because if Mother Superior volumes 1, 2, and 3 weren’t enough for a one way ticket to the Lake of Fire, Bad Nun ought to seal the deal.  Think Mother Superior 3 only this time with penises. 

If you were expecting this to be a whole new movie with a whole new plot you’re in for a bit of disappointment.  When I suggested that Bad Nun was Mother Superior 3 with penises, I wasn’t kidding.  The movies share a number of scenes, but only one of them a sex scene.  Since it’s a five scene video we don’t feel short changed, or at least I didn’t, your mileage may vary.  Personally I really enjoy listening to actors deliver Nica’s lines, and she’s once again made some great casting choices, which enhances the enjoyment factor.

Bad Nun opens exactly like MS3 -- Mother Magdalene gets the bad news from Father Thomas that a very troubled nun, Sister Malina, played by Nikita Denise, is about to enter Magdalene’s convent.  Magdalene isn’t happy, but grudgingly goes along with what her superiors want.  What she mainly doesn’t want is competition for the delicious young nuns (and, apparently priests) under her control. 

Then we see the delectable Lara Brookes showing Sister Malina to her room.  We see the start of Malina’s seduction of Lara, just like MS3, but, then, we dissolve to a new scene involving Sister Malina in the confessional with a young priest played by Tyler Nixon.  When he hears what Sister Malina has to confess he naturally gets an erection which the corrupt sister is more than happy to take care of for him.  It’s hot, sweaty, animal sex with a background of religious icons.  Lots of positions and a nice creamy finish on Sister Malina’s belly.  It was either very hot in the room or these two really worked at banging each other because they are both dripping with sweat.  Sister Malina is very red in the face.  Her focus on Tyler as he was hitting the home stretch was amazing.  Watch her face – she never breaks eye contact with him during that last minute or so of the scene.

Poor Lara Brookes – she’s done the nasty with Sister Malina and now she’s got buyer’s remorse.  She’s so confused.  She seeks guidance in prayer, where she encounters another priest (I didn’t realize that convents had so many priests in them), Father Ryan, played by Seth Gamble.  The good Father and Sister Lara exchange fleeting glances as they’re both seeking the Lord’s guidance.  Soon it’s googly-eyes, then hand holding, and, well, doggone it, they end up horizontal and superimposed on a bed.  Kids will be kids and before long they’re both, gasp, naked!  Yikes.  I should have signed up for a convent when I was in high school.  I might have lost my virginity a LOT sooner.  Father Ryan gives young Sister Lara a good seeing to and leaves a liquid tribute on her belly by way of thanks.  But, poor Lara is REALLY troubled now:  not only did she do the nasty with Sister Malina, she compounded it by getting it on with a BOY.  Nuns are supposed to be married to Jesus, who, I’m reliably told, isn’t porking them … yet.

So, now, she goes back to pray some more (because that worked so well the first time) and this time meets Mother Magdalene.  This is a scene copied and pasted from Mother Superior 3, and it’s well worth watching again, because, well, it’s Magdalene.  Her seduction of Lara is classic older/younger lesbian action and I didn’t mind the repeat. You can read my original review for the details.

Next we see Father Ryan lighting candles and practicing piety.  IF we needed proof that God doesn’t exist, we have it here, as Father Ryan makes the sign of the cross and doesn’t spontaneously burst into flames.  As he’s praying, Mother Magdalene walks in, gives us that patented Magdalene predator smile, and asks Father Ryan if she can speak with him privately.  If this was a horror movie, we’d be screaming at him “DON’T GO, FATHER RYAN!  IT’S A TRAP!”  But, this is porn, and we like seeing Seth Gamble doing the nasty with beautiful women like Magdalene St Michaels, so instead, we’re cheering him on.

Father Ryan is so busted, and I think he knows it, when he asks “Is something wrong Mother?” and she
replies, “I said privately.  Follow me please.”  Whoops.  He tries playing dumb.  Bad move.  I’ll tell you what – if Mother Magdalene ever told me to “choose your words carefully” in that voice to ME, I’d wet myself on the spot.  Father Ryan is definitely a better man than I am, as he manages to hear this line without wetting himself.  Of course he’s wearing black, so how can we tell?  Having tried, and failed, to bluff his way out of his predicament, he admits his sin and tries for remorse and repentance.  Nice try pal, but it’s an epic fail, mainly because he hasn’t figured out what Mother Magdalene’s REAL game is.  Next, he tries for piety.  Poor bastard.  He’s way overmatched and doesn’t know it.  Damn, this is a GREAT scene, and Magdalene’s delivery of Nica Noelle’s brilliant script is riveting.  For those who usually FF through this stuff to get to the sex, I urge you NOT to do that here.  It’s worth watching.  Seth Gamble does a wonderful job of squirming under the intense gaze of Mother Magdalene.   If this doesn’t win an AVN award you’ll have a tough time convincing me they’re not rigged.

In short order it’s not Magdalene’s gaze that Father Ryan is squirming under, but her body.  She wants him to convince her of his devotion to his vows of chastity by seeing if he can resist her sexual advances.  He can’t of course and I can’t blame him because I couldn’t either.  She takes Father Ryan like Grant took Richmond.  It was never in doubt, of course, but all the same, her seduction of the young priest is masterful and entertaining.

This isn’t the first time these two have hooked up in front of the camera so there’s some familiarity there as well as good chemistry.  Magdalene is in charge, as opposed to Seth’s scene with Lara, where he ran the show.  She takes her pleasure with him and the fact that he gets some too is not the point.  I love watching Magdalene St. Michaels have sex.  She’s a beautiful woman (even more beautiful in person than on camera, in my opinion) and when she’s having sex on camera she is committed to it 110 per cent.  She doesn’t leave her pleasure, or her partner’s, to chance, whether it’s a man or a woman.  She’s doing what she loves doing and it shows.  Seth Gamble is a real cutie and since I play for both teams, I don’t mind eye candy like this.  He’s attentive and energetic.  He gives Mother Magdalene everything she wants and leaves her panting.  Great scene.

And now, we come to the crux of the matter.  Mother Magdalene wants Sister Malina out of her hair, her life, her bed, and most of all, out of her way.  She has young girls to seduce and Malina is interfering.  Plus she dominated Mother Magdalene in their previous encounter (see MS3).  So, Mother Magdalene storms into Father Christian’s office without an appointment to discuss an urgent matter.  Father Christian is played by Mark Davis, one of the best actors in the history of porn (which is one reason why he’s in the Hall of Fame).  She narcs out Sister Malina to Father Christian, and tells him that Malina is seducing the young sisters and the young priests as well.

Father Christian agrees to talk with Sister Malina.  Mother Magdalene isn’t too keen on the plan but seems mollified for the moment.

Next, we see Father Christian escorting Sister Malina down the hall toward a pair of double doors – to his private chambers as it turns out.  The doors close with a clang and are locked from the inside.  Then comes the confrontation.

Sister Malina is now dealing with a true Dominant, and the difference between her interactions with the other nuns and priests is readily apparent right from the get go.  He tells her straight up that the powers she serves are no match for the powers he serves, or, for that matter, for him.

Then he grabs Sister Malina by the neck, throws her on the bed, and attempts an exorcism-by-sexual-assault.  Wow.  This isn’t the usual fare in a Nica Noelle video (leaving Nobody’s Daughter aside for the moment).  This looks more like a Sex and Submission scene.  The shock value is excellent.  We weren’t expecting this.  Davis puts the hammer down and never lets up on the gas as he pushes Nikita through her sexual paces.  Wow!  What a fantastic closing scene.  Sister Malina responds perfectly to Father Christian’s ministrations, but, in the end, how do we know who won?  There’s an interesting twist here involving the money shot, but I’m not going to spoil it.

OK, so, to summarize, this is a worthy match for the all-girl Mother Superior 3 and the fact that Bad Nun borrows from MS3 is not a distraction.  Great script, great acting, and, of course, great direction combine to make a very enjoyable video that runs nearly 160 minutes.  Good value for anyone’s money.  You can rent or buy this video online at AEBN.  I think it’s worth watching and I hope you will agree after you see it.

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